Operation Rubidoux Sundown V - Victory!

See also:

Advanced Scouting Party Report
Project Police Picture Pages Phor Pilots...Plus People Phailing to Participate in a Phun Phenomenon
Chapter One Surrenders After Furious Assault

Russ Erb

Originally published March 1997

WHAT A SMASHING SUCCESS! THE BEST FLY-IN PARTY OF 1997! (Of course, we haven't had ours yet...) Once again, the Project Police were exceptionally successful in their annual raid on Flabob and EAA Fiefdom 1.

As was our mission, we squelched any creeping uprisings of low quality work in the construction of homebuilt aircraft, stamped out cynicism amongst the ranks, and made sure everyone present had a good time! The new Project Police Tactical Assault Force uniform T-shirts were a big hit (Thanks to PP Officer Ron Applegate for production)

The Project Police noted a severe lack of cheese on the cheeseburgers. Other than that, they were excellent.

In the most recent issue of the Chapter 1 Newsletter, just received here at the Project Police war room, a hand written note from EAA Fiefdom 1 Dictator-For-Life Jan Johnson sez "Thanks to the Fun Project Police Wagon (sic) bunch! Jan." She goes on in her column to say "Thanks to Virgil Polit for making the Anti Project Police (use of improper typeface noted--ed) signs, the "1000" fly guys made a hasty retreat to the desert since they were not here Saturday night, fear must have overtaken them. HA!" Once again, history has misinterpreted the facts. True Project Police aficionados know that, like the forces of DESERT STORM, the Project Police never retreat; they withdraw once the stated mission is accomplished, and do not press on to political goals of questionable utility. Besides, most of the Project Police don't maintain their night currency.

The Project Police tracked down the previously mentioned Mr. Polit (age 15) and dealt with him appropriately. We scoffed at the weak defenses, then congratulated him for his cleverness. He will be assimilated--later intel indicates he is building a Kitfox Series 5 Safari.

The EAA Chapter from Corona was so impressed with the job we did at Flabob, they blurted out their normal meeting time and location. Stay tuned!

About 200 flyers were distributed around Flabob announcing the May 17 Chapter 49 Breakfast/Chapter 1000 Bar-B-Q Lunch at Rosamond. Intelligence reports show rumblings of a counter-attack attempt. The Project Police are invincible, but only with the participation of every Project Police Officer (that includes YOU!) in our defenses. Plan to participate in our Fly-In!

Read on for other smashing accounts of the events of the raid....

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Advanced Scouting Party Report

The Schmoooooozzzz Meister (aka George Gennuso)

Originally published March 1997

The advanced scouting party consisting of Chuck Firth, Ron Applegate, Jack Roth and myself landed early, very early, unnoticed by the Chapter One lackeys even though we prominently displayed our Project Police Aerial Assault Vehicle placards on our airplanes. We milled around the crowd pre-selecting vulnerable targets. We did spot some Project Police Prohibited signs (Red circle with bar over our logo) and targeted them for direct hits. After all, the Project Police are welcome everywhere and do not tolerate such nonsense. I personally pulled over two of the Chapter One lackeys that were putting around on those silly little scooters directing traffic. I let them off easy with a large fine and citation. We saw many Chapter 49 members there and established their loyalty to our chapter and let them go. I think they witnessed us putting some Chapter One pond scum up against the wall and verbally assaulting them as we frisked and patted them down. I don't think they wanted any of that. I will let Chuck tell you about the restaurant incident. Many incriminating pictures were taken and will be used to indict the guilty parties..... That's all for now (Jeeze, these shirts are hot!)

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Project Police Picture Pages phor Pilots...
Plus People Phailing to Participate in a Phun Phenomenon
(YES, SOME OF US PHLEW PHANTOMS PREVIOUSLY)

By: Bob "Schwartz" Waldmiller, SUPREME ALLIED AIR COMMANDER, PROJECT POLICE TACTICAL ASSAULT FORCE

Originally published March 1997

- It took some real forethought and planning on my part to come up with the Ops plan for Rubidoux Sundown V. A couple of minutes later. I had synthesized a detailed Air Tasking Order and proclaimed the incredibly complex attack procedures to all participating Project Police members: "Let's get there by noon."

- Stealing the idea from Independence Day 4, your ever resourceful Project Police Strike Director coordinated a precision aerial strike from numerous airports simultaneously using GPS for accurate nano-second timing. Split second timing was required to ensure mission success. The results were nothing short of phenomenal as all the PPTAF (Project Police Tactical Assault Force) aerial assault vehicles arrived the same...day!

- At times, however, poor GPS coverage in the Supreme Allied Commander's aircraft meant finding an alternate navigation source. We switched on the high resolution map mode on the multi-mode radar installed in the nose cone of the FC-140 Fighting Cherokee. WSO's generally don't like to use the radar much because they usually get sick watching the picture rotate at 2600 RPM!

THE SUPREME ALLIED AIR COMMANDER MANEUVERS HIS PROJECT POLICE TACTICAL ASSAULT FORCE AIRCRAFT INTO THE HEAVILY DEFENDED TARGET AREA

- Details, details, details...There was so much to do and so little time to think. Operation Rubidoux Sundown is one of our biggest events and every year it gets better. Just to be certain we'd remember how to do this again however, I took the EAA Chapter 1000 Newsletter Editor (pictured here in the center, flanked by two anonymous Project Police behemoths) along with me to accurately record the facts of the Raid on Rubidoux as we made them up.

- I'm still working on the 50 mission crush in my hat. Only 35 missions and 12 boxtops to go. Project Police member Erb is shown modeling the Desert Storm brigade Project Police Fedora, while P4 (Project Police and President Pelletier) intimidates the locals with his ATF-lookin' black ballistic cap. (Nice going! Now everyone knows who the anymouse (sic) members are!! Security Breach!! --ed)

OH NO! THE IDENTITIES OF THREE PROJECT POLICE MEMBERS HAVE BEEN REVEALED!! AT LEAST "BOB" WAS SMART ENOUGH TO SPELL HIS NAME BACKWARDS TO HIDE HIS TRUE IDENTITY

- There is no telling who you're going to run into during a Project Police raid. Rubidoux Sundown V was no different. Even if we know the victim(s), the Project Police never let mere friendship stand in the way of an impartial, thorough, and relentless raid, especially if there are homemade chocolate chip cookies involved.

RESISTANCE IS FUTILE. YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED.

- Cleverly disguised as ATF agents, complete with black shirts with "PPTAF" emblazoned in foot-high letters on the back (yes, some of the more gullible passers-by bought this one!) we perused the phlight line and watched the unsuspecting Chapter 1 members pontificate to their less phortunate phellows. There were signs around the battleground which seemed to indicate a minor resistance to our raid, but they were of little consequence. We acknowledged the fact that they could spell Project Police two out of three times, but the Project Police do not recognize the international prohibited symbol, since it is a well known fact that no one can tell the Project Police what to do. It's that omniscient thing again.

- Again taking our cue from General Schwartzwaldmiller, the victorious Project Police set up a tent at the last battle line so that terms of surrender could be dictated to the defeated imperious leader of EAA Fiefdom 1, the infamous Jan "the Hammer" Johnson. All due attention was paid to protocol, yet the defeated forces still showed signs of defiance as documented in the photograph below. This was not apparent until after the raiders had gone home victorious. Will this defiance stand??? I think not. Get ready for Rubidoux Sundown VI.......hahahahahaha!

WE WILL PILLAGE AND PLUNDER YET AGAIN.....

YES, JAN JOHNSON, THE EAA CHAPTER 1000 PROJECT POLICE WILL BE BACK NEXT YEAR TO RAID EAA CHAPTER 1... YOU CAN COUNT ON IT!

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Chapter One Surrenders after Furious Assault:

Chuck Firth

Originally published March 1997

Rubidoux Sundown V was the complete success only Chapter 1000 could arrange. Cessna 140 recce sorties commenced at 0700 and were followed by Weasels in Long EZ's doing defensive systems suppression shortly thereafter. They never had a chance. The main assault force arrived over target at about 0900 and the Chapter 1 troops started scurrying for cover. When the dust cleared, our fearless leader, General Shwarzwaldmiller, declared Flabob completely Poberized. Give the Flabobians credit however, as we rounded them up they dissed us with considerable attitude. Something about how we didn't quite fit our uniforms, particularly our hats. They even had signs up to indicate where we were welcome--the Big Johnies and the exit gate. We ignored all the claptrap and spent the rest of the day taking pictures of ourselves in our PPTAF T-shirts. We sure looked good. (PPTAF? Project Police Tactical Assault Force. And you had to ask.)

In all honesty, Jan Johnson and the rest of Chapter 1 did a fine job. There were plenty of aircraft to see and lots of people to see them. Saturday was about as good as it gets weather wise and the trip down was a pleasure. Of course there were a few things to complain about. For some reason (like about 300% more traffic than normal), the restaurant couldn't keep up with the flow and there was quite a wait for food. Not a good thing for Project Police types who need plenty of fill from the four basic food groups: sugar, caffeine, fat, and something else we haven't identified. Minor matters however, so congratulations are in order to Chapter 1 for a fine fly in.

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EAA Chapter 1000 Home Page

E-Mail: Web Site Director Russ Erb at erbman@pobox.com

URL: http://www.eaa1000.av.org/ppolice/sundown5.htm
Contents of The Leading Edge and these web pages are the viewpoints of the authors. No claim is made and no liability is assumed, expressed or implied as to the technical accuracy or safety of the material presented. The viewpoints expressed are not necessarily those of Chapter 1000 or the Experimental Aircraft Association.
Revised -- 17 May 1998